Two Niños

From infertility to two babes at once, this is my life…

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Starting Fresh

Posted by Mel on October 24, 2007

I’ve been avoiding writing and I really can’t say why.  I want to write, I think about writing, and I just don’t.  Silly.  I’ve been working on some big ideas for the past few months and I’ve finally come to some decisions regarding them.  I had a business opportunity I was pondering for quite some time.  It was really exciting, was something I could do with my kids, it would have had a positive impact on me physically, and it was exciting.  I was very interested, worked on it for a while, discussed ad nauseum with my husband, and tried to make myself sign the paperwork.  And I just couldn’t.  As much as I wanted to and as much as I thought it was a great thing, something was holding me back.  I just couldn’t make that commitment.  And then, after sitting on it for a few weeks, it finally dawned on me why I couldn’t move forward.  It’s time for some status quo around here.  We have been moving from ONE BIG THING to the next for the last several years – literally, the big things have been overlapping with no room to breathe – from trying to get pregnant, to miscarrying, to infertility treatments, to being pregnant (with 2, yeah!), to having babies (2, yeah!), to moving cities, to my husband starting a job where he is gone all week, to buying a house and then FINALLY selling our other house.  It has been non-stop.  And my gut is telling me it is time to sit back and enjoy for a while….catch up to where we are, marinate for a bit, and really just be.  It seems weird – I guess I’ve gotten used to always having something big going on….but it is kind of exciting to think about just enjoying life for what it is right now.  And for us that means tackling projects on our new (old) house, doing some traveling as a family, spending time with our kids, making new friends in our new town, and just enjoying each other.  It is weird – it is taking some effort for me to remember not to spend time thinking about the NEXT BIG THING and to just sit back and experience all of the small little things everyday.  I’m trying and I think it will be good.  One small goal…to start writing more.  I want to so I will.  And done….

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